Thursday, January 19, 2006

I have confession....I watch American Idol

I have confession...I watch American Idol

Yes, I watch American Idol. I know, I know it's mindless reality TV, but it's funny and it does take actual talent to succeed on the show. Unlike say 'Joe Millionaire, 'The Swan', or 'Who want to marry my dad?', those shows are pure 100% pap.

Plus it's fun to see real people on TV, you know the ones I'm talking about. Ones that make you feel really good about yourself. Ones that make you say "Damn, and I thought I was weird/strange/dumb."

Last night's show did not fail in the least to deliver.

Here's three that if you saw the show you know what I'm talking about.

First we've got "Flawless."

Yes, that's what he called himself, even though he had trouble getting a complete sentence out without mispronouncing words. He couldn't even say the catch line for HIS cleaning company without f*%#ing it up! And IIRC the line was "Paradise Cleaning...Come home to Paradise" or something like that. Note he was NOT saying this in front of the judges but rather in the hallway on camera.

This, kids, is what happens when you do too many drugs.

Next we've got the "Floating Coaster Guy"

He's an "inventor", but I have yet to figure out why someone would invent a drink coaster that "floated" your drink so that if you set it off center you spilled it. BRILLIANT!!

And upcoming singers should take note not to sing "If I only had a brain" from the Wizard of Oz. Or if you do sing that, please sing it in tune and with some tone.

Finally we've got Zachary, yes Zachary.

This guy was Shocked, SHOCKED that people always mistook him for a girl. HELLO!!

Is it any wonder people think he was a girl? He was wearing a girl's shirt, girl's pants/belt, girl's shoes (HIGH FREAKING HEAL BOOTS!!), has his hair cut like a girl's, weighs about 90lbs, and has a voice like girl's!!

I couldn't tell if both his ears were pierced or if he was wearing makeup.

But from the pic you can tell he pucks his eyebrows, and I don't know any guy that does that unless they want to look like a girl.

I don't know what was funnier. Hearing Zachary say "people mistake me for a girl" or seeing judge Randy Jackson say "Wait, you're a guy? Really?!?"